Things that make me happy

- Fluffy pillows
- Spring air
- Time to do nothing
- A good book
- Knowing that there are people who care
- Fresh flowers
- Squishy soft toys
- Milo
- Steamed fish
- Nice nails
- Good hair day
- Pretty dresses
- 8 hours of sleep
- Good company
- Receiving paper mail (letters, gifts not bills)
- Cold milk tea
- Someone who listens
- Finding good bargains
- Music
- Surprises
- Praline chocolate
- Funny stuff
- Comics
- Ice-cream

Faustian Bargain

Faustian bargain [(fow-stee-uhn)]
Faust, in the legend, traded his soul to the devil in exchange for knowledge. To “strike a Faustian bargain” is to be willing to sacrifice anything to satisfy a limitless desire for knowledge or power.

American Heritage New Dictionary of Cultural Literacy, Third Edition

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I'm doing a psychology class on exceptional people (Einstein, Stravinsky, Freud etc etc) and I've learnt that many these successful people have rather terrible interpersonal relationships. So, it seems that if you want to be exceptional, you have to sacrifice something for such ability.

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I guess it is true. To have good grades in university, you got to sacrifice your social life, sleep, health to squeeze out that 4.0 GPA. I mean, there are definitely some people out there who seem to have it all: not study much and do well, but they still have to put in some effort to get to their current location. To them, the sacrifice might not be that great. Hm, maybe these people enjoy their work, so they do not need to experience other more enjoyable activities. *focus all energy into cramming for exams. Ooo.. I'm so happy*

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Hm, so to get better grades, better career prospects, I got to sacrifice something for it. It may be my Spongebob cartoons, my msn-ing, my social life, my slacking. This is so icky.

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If you feel that one part of your life is totally crappy, maybe it is because you spend too much time and effort in some other aspect. *need balanced lifestyle* But after being balanced and well adjusted, maybe you won't be so 'exceptional' after all.

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Note: You may have a crappy unbalanced life and be rather pathetic (not exceptional).

Decisions

I am unproductive. I have not been doing anything useful, practical, academic related, for the past 3 days.

My undergraduate days are coming to a close. I'm worrying about not being able to graduate. I feel so paranoid.

Where I am now is the product of whatever I did. Sometimes I reflect about my life and regret/mull over certain things. It is my choice, my decision, which has led me to my current situation.

OF says God already has your life mapped out. So, He knows what will happen to you. But I guess you should make the best of what you have, and work towards your goals. Hm, things don't simply fall from the sky.

I still feel unproductive. I'm not doing anything, towards anything. I need some form of stimulation. *zaps myself with an electrical prod*

People watching

Friday: in some 9am class with 30 minutes of sleep
30 min of sleep: writing 10 page essay, 25%, on the night before it is due. Bad idea.

Professor was late, so I people watched. The girl sitting next to me was a classic GF2. I've noticed her in class before (because she is gf2-like), but today she was in closer proximity.

She is dainty and sweet with long rebonded hair that she touches every few seconds. *flick flick* She has nicely painted pink fingernails and smells like bubblegum (really, sugar sweet). Even her nice neat round-ish handwriting is sweet.

All the while, she was talking to this other guy. He is rather plain looking (nice way of saying below average) and kind of flabby (note: I think lots of people are flabby, so he might not really be flabby in usual sense. It's just my view. =P). Then the professor came and when lesson was about to start, he stood up and left the class.

Yikes. He is one of those guys. You know, those men that hang around girls they like, i.e. to jio* the bubblegum sweetie. The girls are usually relatively nice and friendly to such men, but everyone knows it is highly unlikely they will ever consider dating them (the men). (Possibly everyone, except him, knows she doesn't consider him)

Haha, it gives me such an ecky aftertaste watching such a scene. The men are so lame. It's 9am on Friday and he is in class to accompany the girl for 10 minutes before class starts. Ew ew. Somehow I'm disgusted at the rather desperate jioing methods.

I guess people have to try, somehow, to date people a lot better looking than they are. How else would extremely ugly people get married? (hm, maybe they marry other extremely ugly people?)

I'm so mean. I'm so not going to get jioed for the next eternity.

*Jio: (Singlish) chase, woo

Dating 101: When he does too much (without you wanting him to).

I figured I'm not so great at whining, so I shall dish out unsolicited dating/relationship advice instead. Hahaha.

He (includes partners, boyfriends, almost boyfriends, people who like you, etc etc) does too much when:
- He does your Math assignments for you (including visiting your professor to ask questions) when you told him: "leave it, it's fine"
- Neglects sleep, social life, food, schoolwork to keep you company
- Washes your all dishes
- Folds 1000 paper cranes for you, write your name on many tiny macaronis (that sort of thing)

These are just examples... They may or may not have happened to me (or my friends). Don't speculate. Tsk!

After doing all these redundant, yet sweet, things, he will complain or feel wei3 qu1 (wronged).
Why? Because he had invested so much time/effort and you didn't reciprocate/appreciate.

My point of view (and, maybe, other females):
Hello?! I didn't ask you to do so many things... so if you don't want to do it, don't. Else, do it (to make me happy) and don't complain.

I don't know why guys think that we should appreciate the things we didn't ask/want them to do. My analogy: Guys doing too much (without me wanting him to) = force feeding (caviar), when I'm full and fat.

Oh yes, we unappreciative females appreciate your kind thoughts and attempts (keyword: attempts), to please us. You are nice and kind and sweet, but PLEASE don't complain, whine or feel wronged after doing what you chose to do. We didn't put a gun to your head.
(You might have the right to whine, if we forced you into the task.)

So, guys, go ahead and do whatever you want to proclaim your undying love. Just don't sulk and expect that we will always appreciate it (as much as you like us to).

Qualifier: You still got to do the basic stuff that is expected of you. (i.e. send the girl home, celebrate valentine's day/birthday/anniversary, listen to her talk/whine/bitch/cry)

Spring cheated on me.

The damn weather. It's cold AGAIN and it's MARCH. Hello, where is my Spring? For those who are not so well informed, when I say cold, I mean below 0 degree celsius cold. Oh, I so miss the 25 deg monsoon cold in Singapore. (Eh, not really.) My ideal outside temperature is between 10 - 15 deg. I feel that some politician needs to build a huge globe around the city and set the thermostat to 15 deg.

Besides that, I'm freezing indoors. This is terrible. Now it is 17 deg (still bearable), but I sometimes wake up to 13 deg INDOOR temperatures. The thermostat at home is CURSED. It only has a turn on/off function. The temperature dials on it -> SCAM!

Here is a continuation about the terrible living conditions that I'm forced to live with.
(Refer to Neurotic for my housemates' heating woes.)

Okay.. So I feel cold and I turn on the heat. )@(#*@)(#@! CHLORINE GAS START COMING OUT OF MY HEAT VENT!!!!!! Poison poison. They used Chlorine to kill people in WW1.

Either the drug-using nuts in the basements are trying to poison me (and the rest of the house) or the landlord or his assistant (V. N.) is trying to save $ by making hot air a form of poison.

When we DIE, you will have no rent to collect. Argh. Sheesh. The Chlorine is probably going to take some time to kill md, so evil landlord could still squeeze rent out of me!

Evil landlord choices:
SAVE $ as stupid renters don't use heat
SPEND $ to slowly kill some pesky renters

He got the best of everything eh?
(I didn't know it is so easy to torment people. The tips I pick up in Toronto. Tsk.)

Yadayada. He might be trying to clean the air vent with Chlorine. But it is below -6 deg outside.

The lives of poor undergraduates are worth nothing. When I get rich and famous and all, I'll get back at all these people. Shoot diamond bullets at them.

But now, I'm stuck without heat.

Anger issues

Am I a really angry person? I don't know. I guess I'm somewhat more in control of my behaviour/temper than in the past. (Blame aging.)

Pissed off at some academic nonsense.

- didn't do great on test. didn't have time to finish.
- some idiot tried to overcharge me for past tests
- mailman didn't come today. Hello? Where's my acceptance/rejection letter?

Hm. I didn't use to be so concern about my grades... Nay, I'm always that way. Why. I need to learn to relax. My 1st year in university was fine, then I somehow morphed into some cao mugger. Sheesh. And if you think (North America) overseas education is easy, think again. Hard like hell. I don't know where I got notions that I will get to slack in uni. Worse, far worse than JC years. Far worse, and less fun. The only people who seem to have a relatively easy time in university are those in Australia.

I cooked some multi coloured bubble tea pearls to cheer myself up.But then the pearls got stuck to the bottom of the pot. -_-

So much for cheering myself up. (But I did manage to scrap them off the pot, so not ALL is lost. There is still hope in the world.)

Spring!

Spring is here. Sort of. The daylight saving nonsense has just ate away another hour of my day. But who cares! Spring is here! Hola!

But I'm stuck in some overly anxious situation. A horrid ECO test on Friday. 2 papers and 1 presentation next week. And yar, graduate school acceptance/rejection letters should be coming my way this week or the next.

ARgh. How horrid to be me. I can't enjoy spring without the burden of assorted things on my mind.

And I've class now so I have no time to complain.

At least one thing is getting better... the weather!! Spring!!!

Spread the joy!

I was feeling a tat blue and I stumbled upon this: It's Hard to Be Humble by Mac Davis

It doesn't sound great but it makes me happy. =)! (especially if you sing along)

Haha. My narcissistic self.

Types of girlfriends

In a rather pathetic attempt to escape school work, I will blog.

I have only thought about blogging (about this topic) today but the idea have been floating around for a while...

There are 2 distinct kinds of girlfriends one can get.

One of them looks like this:

GF 1

The other looks like this:

GF 2

Due to my rather ugly msword drawings, I shall elaborate further on the GFs.

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GF 1 is rather plain looking (normal people you see on the streets or the extras walking around on channel 8 shows). She's the sort of girl you can be really good friends with, but you wouldn't date (or say you wouldn't date). She doesn't have many suitors.

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GF 2 is usually above average looking or considered good looking. She might not be drop dead gorgeous, but she is possibly the most attractive girl in class, on the MRT train, at your work place. She usually has a couple of suitors and guys want to be her friend.

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These GFs are sort of modelled after real life couples I've encountered. But relax, I'm sure you are not one of these people. =) =) *peace*

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Assumption: Everyone has a great personality.

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BF 1s, boyfriends of GF 1s, are usually rather decently nice to their GFs. But they don't seem to be oh-so-proud of their partners. On facebook/friendster, one hardly sees pictures of GF 1 on BF 1's site. BF 1 usually thinks his gf is nice and he can marry her, yada yada, but that's it. BF 1 doesn't carry pictures of GF 1 in his wallet. He doesn't steal glances at his GF 1 or notice how beautiful she is. He might tell her that she looks good, but he doesn't mean it 100%. He might have a soft spot for better looking girls, he just doesn't tell his gf about it.

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BF 2s, boyfriends of GF 2s, are usually the opposite of BF 1s. He is the guy who goes on and on about how pretty his gf is even though no one is interested. His friends talk among themselves about how unfair the world is: Why BF 2, of all people, have a pretty gf. He carries her picture in his wallet and likes to "stamp his name on her head" to show that she is attached. (This will fend off other random suitors.) You see her picture on his friendster/facebook. He is frequently afraid that he will lose GF 2 to other guys.

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Everyone guy wants a GF 2, even though they don't mention it. (Disclaimer: some guys might classify GF1s as GF2s. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.) They usually end up with a GF 1 when they figure out they can't get a GF 2, or when they fall in love with someone's personality. (Though evolution normally doesn't work that way -> Attractive people look more healthy, thus, better genes!)

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But couples normally fall between the spectrum of GF1/BF1 & GF2/BF2. So maybe people are not that superficial after all. Heck. They are. I've heard one too many: I wouldn't date girls more than 50kg. Hai.. Why are people so superficial.. I don't know. I am too.

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Side note: I just bought some Eyes Lips Face makeup yesterday and they have been SHIPPED! Hurray! I got to be vain vain. Because the world requires me to be. =)

School Songs

I was thinking of my old school songs yesterday.. and I can't remember them.
To give myself some credit, I didn't forget everything...

Primary School (XPS):
78% recalled

*We the pupils of XPS
In spirit we are one
As brothers help each other
In study and at play
Working towards perfection
In school from day to day
Humility and honesty
Love and respect for all
School and to community
We will answer to your call (back to *)

But I can't remember how it ends...


Secondary School (TKGS):
25% recalled

We can not all be heros and throw a hemisphere?
With some great daring venture, some deed that mocks at fear
But we can fill a life time with kindly acts and truth?
For glory of the country and ......

I think there are 3 stanzas..


Junior College (VJC):
Can't recall the tune... Copied the lyrics from wikipedia

Victoria in Singapore
There are other schools we know
Victoria is something more
The school that watch'd us grow

For here we've learnt and striven too
And played the sportsman's game
Victoria we give to you
The honour that you claim

Victoria thy sons are we
And we will not forget
Victoria thy triumphs see
And victories we share yet

For others came before and went
And carried to the world
Victoria's fame and our intent to
Keep her flag unfurled


Okay.. So why am I writing all these? I hope someone out there will stumble upon my blog and fill in the blanks in the songs for me. Hehe..
If that doesn't work out.. At least I've a partial record of the songs, before they all get wiped off my bad bad memory.

I still can't believe I remember most of my Pri school song.. 6 years of brainwashing singing. Haha.

Slacking around

After my rather traumatic 2 essays, 1 midterm week, I've decided to bum around and not do anything this weekend. Up till now, I have yet to accomplish ANY school work. Maybe I should start.

Some random things I do when I'm slacking around:

1) My housemate's (OH) door. Notice it's dark in the room (no light underneath door). OH and gf are in the room. 2) And here is the sign on the door. Hmmm. =P

3) Just for information: Here is what's hanging from my doorknob.

Oh... I've also got myself this new Sony Ericsson z610i. And I've figured out how to download FREE games onto my phone (go to www.mobile9.com). So I'm playing Tamagotchi V1. Ahh... Games from my not so long ago childhood.
I tried to play the game in fast mode, but it's still REAL slow.. But the it suddenly went really fast and Fluff (tamagotchi's name) started pooing quite a lot and got really sick.

For those of the non-tamagotchi generation: The skull means Fluff is sick, he's not dead.

That's Fluff's poo.

So there.. this is my rather uneventful weekend.

Back

Haven't been posting for a while. I wanted to, really. Just that darn blogger wants me to log on with a gmail account. But the un-tech-savy me DOESN'T have a gmail account! Yes, yes, I know I'm like so behind. But I have enough trouble with managing 3 emails accounts. )(@#*(!#).

Okay.. But I finally got myself a gmail account, AFTER HOURS of thinking what name to use. Sheesh. I can't believe it. I spend time worrying about the name of my gmail account when there's world poverty and people dying of AIDS. Anyway, that precisely what I did. (I can't believe that people use nicks like pinkapples, fluffypillows, handsinmypockets(or sth like that)). I must have tried all possible combinations for an oh-so-me email, but didn't manage to settle for anything until today. Today. when I got all bored, tired and sick of school, I set up my email account. All this on a glorious friday evening. What a life.

Some updates on my not-so-cool life.
1) I slept like 1.5 hours last night/morning. Slept at 7am, woke at 8.30am for my 9am test.
Tell me again why did I procrastinate?!

2) I hate school. Have not receive word from any of the graduate schools that I have applied to. Wondering what was going through my mind when I applied for PhD. Today's conversations with a couple of graduate students steered me further away from that path.

3) I need Manolo Blahniks. I've never had them and probably won't be having them any time soon. But still..

4) Going through another one of my stages of I-so-need _______. Currently it's nice eyes. So I'm busy trying to figure out how to reduce eye bags (drink apple cider vinegar?) and lengthen my eyelashes. (I'm off grocery shopping tomorrow for my health/vanity fix.)